Did you hear that?

That *ka-pwiiing*?

That was the last piece of bailing wire holding my shit together today snapping and flying across the room.

Went to CVS at lunch and there was an empty endcap at the end of an aisle, basically a metal shelf 4″ off the floor. Know what is *not* in your line of sight as you come around the end of an aisle that seemingly has no display at the end of it?

Yeah, that fucker took me out. I was very close to raging Karen status, but by the time I got to checkout, I just calmly said they needed to move it or put a display on it as it had caused me to faceplant.

Get back to work after lunch and there is a “time sensitive video message” from the CEO, which everyone was trying to watch and overloading the media server.

Bear in mind, I am well aware all of this could be worse. I know this. I am still allowed to be salty about it.

We’ve gotta make some moves…so our investors don’t go elsewhere. So, the employees have to take the hit because our investors didn’t understand that there is inherent risk to any investment? Boy, do I have some demands to make with the companies in the mutual fund in my 401K if that’s how this all works. Seriously, the CEO really should have just left that little detail *out* of the conversation.

The good news is no layoffs planned. But some furloughs (not me) and pay cuts for all my friends for at least the next six months! Raises and promotions out the window for the rest of the year. (Guess who just lost her upgrade that was part of the transfer to the new gig?) They didn’t say next year’s bonus for this year’s performance is trashed, but I wrote that off a while ago.

And thanks to no temporary UBI, and the fact that I’m not getting furloughed, I have no way to recoup this pay cut. I’d be better off with no pay cut and a 2 week furlough, same payroll expense for the company, but I’d at least be able to get unemployment for the furlough and some much needed downtime. Or hell, just cut my hours by the same percentage so I can leave early on Fridays, shit, that would be worth it.

And an extra kicker, they won’t up the carryover amount for PTO at year end, so you can’t even shift your PTO to when it will be worth more.

And bless his damn heart, the CEO couldn’t stop repeating that this is temporary over and over, and to be positive. Over and over.

I’M GETTING REALLY FUCKING TIRED OF BEING POSITIVE. EVERYTHING IS HARD AND UGLY AND KINDA SCARY AND BEING POSITIVE IS FUCKING HARD WORK THESE DAYS.

And the final insult to injury? A day like this, I’d probably make the rare weeknight trip to my bar for beer and decompression and West Coast baseball. AND I CAN’T DO THAT EITHER CAUSE MY BAR IS CLOSED AND THERE IS NO BASEBALL.

Fuck, I know it could be worse.

I’m just very…

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